Subject: Truest Loves Date: Thu, 17 Oct 2002 23:36:26 -0700 From: "Christina Schmelling" To: "Howling Wolf" , "CyberLegend aka Jure Sah" Truest Loves, I have no secerets. I am an open book to you both. I think from now on when I email I will send the mails to both of you. First of all to Robert I was really happy to wake up this morning and see an email from you. It gave me joy as always. I have not heard from you in awhile so it was nice. I miss you so much although you have been in my dreams alot lately. To the both of you I know that the offer to loan me money is out there but, its hard to accept it. I Will gladly borrow the money to get the battery for my car if it would make you two happy. Its just that I do not know when I could get the money back to you. I would hope I could get it back to you the middle of November if this would not be to late. First of all I hope you two do not mind me calling you my truest loves. Second If I really am meant to be the Alpha Female which is what I really do think I am to be. I feel like I am meant to bare your cubs the both of your cubs. I know this sounds wierd but, its been in my dreams the last few weeks. I have not told either of you about this dream so I will later in this letter. I have come to the conclusion that Kodiak can sense that I am in heat. He is acting like all the other male dogs in the area. He has curled up next to me in bed today. We went to my parents house so I could say hello to my son and so Kodiak could run around a bit. I am happy my parents are going to let me take Nicky tricker treating for Halloween this year around there old area. They are going to be all but moved out of the area by the beginning of November. I will really miss my son so much. The other thing that happened today it was really embaressing. I decided to lay down and take a nap this afternoon at home and Kodiak hopped up on the bed and started licking me all over. Needless to say it was an awesome experience. I really enjoyed myself the embarressing thing is there came a knock on the door during this so I had to get up out of the bed throw my clothes on and answer the door. It was my cousins husband he wanted to pick Kodiak up to take him home they have really missed him. The dog did not want to go with him. He growled bared his teeth at Erik snarled anything to try to stay with me. I eventually had to grab Kodiak by the collar and take him to Erik's truck. So I am without my Wolf dog right now. I went to bed afterwards for a nap and had a very nice dream with the both of you in it. We were all at my dream territory with the cliff and the lake. We were all on the cliff running around playing around. I just want the both of you to know that I love you very much. You both are my world and I am both of yours forever. To Robert and even to you Jure I hate the States myself. Its just hard because I am stuck here at least until I can get my schooling done and depending on money and scholarship issues might take awhile to get done. I mean right now in the States the economy is sucking very badly. I mean its so hard to get a job right now its pathetic. President Bush is pissing me off because we are at war with Iraq again and Robert definitly knows my feelings about this. He knows that I am totally against the USA trying to start wars with everyone. We (the USA ) Suck. We (USA) are not the greatest thing since sliced bread. I am ashamed to be an American. I can honestly say that I do not fit the typical USA Citizen stereotype. At least I do not think so anyway. Thinking about all the stupid wars we are involved in right now makes me sad makes me want to cry. I know Robert that you are moving to Slovenia I do not blame you its beautiful I looked Slovenia up on the net and wow its very nice. I would really love to live there. Although I am trying to be realistic with myself because it will be awhile until I get there. This is why I asked if you would come over for a holiday or in usa terms a vacation to visit me. I would really enjoy taking you and Jure camping with me at the spot I have mentioned. I also want to take the both of you to Eastern Washington to show you the dusty dunes of my aunts ranch. I want to be with the both of you. You two are in my heart you are in my veins. Knowing the both of you I finally know love. I did not think life was possible without you two. How is it I have lived without the two of you in my life? I do not know the answer to this. I can only say I lived a patheticly sad exsistance. Ok before I start to write a chapter book I will get to my dream I had. Well I think we are at the Cliff forest with the lake I know the both of you know this place. Most of my dreams take place in this type of territory anyway. I am there with you two and I am pregnant with cubs. I will have to meditate and try to remember more of the dream but, being in the city with the noise its hard to remember. I just wanted to let you know that I hope I have not changed anything between the two of you by becoming close friends with the both of you. I hope if I did change things I changed them for the better. If I changed them for the worse I am sure you would tell me. Well I will let you go its almost midnight and I have a busy day tomarrow I will write more tomarrow as always. I also feel this is really worth mentioning again. Know that I am 100% serious when I say this that when I get Nicky back after getting work. I really think Nicky would benefit from being around you two. You are the two best male rolemodels I could ever ask for, for my son. I think it would really benfit my son to be around you two. Know that you both are special to me. I am both of yours always and forever, Love Always and Forever, Christina Aka Mystic Wolf your Alpha Female