Rob wrote: > See what I really meant by disappointed Furry was that I can not > honestly call myself a were until I'm sure of it. Well I think you get > what I'm saying. Yeah, I remember myself looking for info about what a werewolf really is, well, nearly all the time. When at some time I got something that was proof enough to me, I kind of cooled off. > I understand, and I've been pondering this for a while. I want to > figure out if this is what I _want_ to be, or what I _am_. This is the > seperation between Furries and Weres as I understand it. I have heard > from many that I should go through much "soul-searching" before I make > a decision... While I originally took this metaphorically, I have > heard that some go into deep meditation (which I have some trouble > accomplishing)and well "literally" soul-search about this or > something. I don't have the slightest idea of what they're talking > about :) Muggles don't belive in werewolves these days and yet... yet there are some people around the globe that have gotten some information straight out of the blue sky, agreeing atho they never met! We are those people. Nothing incredible about it. > > I am familiar with the close circle of friends aspect, tho. I have > > always been making them wherever I went. =P > > Good for you! MEanwhile, it's tough in middle/high school though > because kids who don't really like you even take the new kids and > point you out. Nevermind. Yeah, I have always managed to find about the 'friends' for me. IRL, at school, at work finnaly. But in that time I have asked myself for a defenition of what a friend is, as it seemed it could be anyone, it was quite depressing. But now, I have the defenition: Friends are the (were)beasts you can make an attached, friendly relationship with. Namely AHWW. ;] > But I am very loyal to my friends, and > attempt to make many of them, some the wrong people. :( Doesn't matter > to me. I got together with a bunch of fellow punk rockers at school > and they're great. I also think that the furry/were communities are > very friendly! It matters that we understand you. =P > Many times have I distanced myself from the idea of human "civility" > and "society". The very fact that people attempt to be civilized is > contradicted by the fact that they discriminate against other, equal > human beings (many of which have been brilliant people, scientists, > authors, etc.) and that makes me question human civility as a cover > for something everyone is hiding. Whatever I just said, I have reached > cognitive overload and cannot respond any further :) LOL. I'll finish > that topic later. anyway, I find much of human society to be, at its > base, cannabalistic and prejudiced. Even kids get corrupted in the > process. :,( I really hate it. I search out the compassionate people > in the world who can make a difference. Again cognitive overload. Bear > with me.I'll finish this later. Oh, I remember this. I kept getting lost in complicated things. And at work, there are lots of complicated things, so I kind of devoloped the idea of explaining by drawing, writing idea logs, etc. If you're really into the topic, I suggest you write some digital text on it and publish it on some obscure webpage, so you will be able to read it when you'll need it. > > And, let me guess you also have a job as a computer programmer at an > > american software company, working on something big? =P > > LOL. Not quite :) There is no reason you wouldn't be. That's why MesonAI was enstablished. > By ignorant people I meant people not understanding > of the situation. "Muggles", I hear a lot. is that a direct reference > to Harry Potter? (BTW I got VERY tired of that series three years ago) > or has that been used much before? OMG, please no Harry Potter!! Argh, I hate hairy potters! =P I learned the word from a prehistoric English dictionary, after first comming accross it on TFO's questionare. I tend to use the word "humans" instead. It feels more appropriate, since we're such animals and the proud humans ussualy don't want to have anything to do with animals. > I have tried programming and it's > not really my thing. I like just about anything else to do with > electronics though (I like really challenging and complex things, like > they're puzzles). That's cool. I've got a little electronics lab simulator (Electronics workbench for **DOS** ;) myself. We could exchange a few shemathics, if you have any. Of the interesting I've got the world's first pacemaker (analog; not functioning in the simulator because it can't simulate the electrodes; woohoo, copied off a photo of the original blueprint) and a pattern-recotnigion circut (digital). I would be interested in seeing the exact circutry plans for the electro-shocker (that converts a supply of 12V to a short pulse of 1000V). > Though I have made my share of small computer games > and I used to make Duke Nukem 3D Maps (Very tough by the way), I have enjoyed playing this game, but only with the jetpack cheat... otherwise it felt just so 2D... Then I got a game named Radix, hehe, much better (just like duke, just that you fly an aircraft and can use homing missiles and the afterburners ;). If you want to check it out, the Interenet holds a 4 meg demo version. > programming isn't something I enjoy, though I even profit from > hacking/wares/bootlegs >:) lol i don't do that anymore. Have you ever tried cracking? Hehe, I remember I've replaced my **hex editor's** copyright statement with a "Feel free to duplicate" message. =P It's a bloody lot of fun, especialy since it can help you extract some of the cool stuff from games that the geekish programers have coded but did not dare to make available. > I really enjoy > videography/video production and have started a small business in my > hometown based upon that :) It is very successful. Very interesting indeed. I was looking for something like this, let's just hope it's what I think it is. What exactly do you do? > I really don't like to be immodest, but sometimes I feel almost _too_ > smart, like I'm just passing time by until I'm no longer bound by the > limited rights (and body) of teens and kids. While I philosophize > daily about what is happening all around us, I absolutely refuse to > pursue it with a course in college. I know many philosophers ended up > taking their own lives through absurd means and/or get sent to the > looney bin. Not for me :) I wait impatiently for the day I step into a > green Mustang GT and drive off. The day I walk out on my own. I am > really starting to pour everything out now, aren't I? LOL not the > time. I've been under great stress lately. That's ok. It actualy is! It's interesting, I still don't get it why humans (I mean muggles) refuse to do it! When I first came online I too thought I was a philosopher, so I kind of cyber-wise grew up at (been there for 2 years!), then a switch fliped in my mind and I could no longer be with those people, before I thought the communication was usefull, but now the only thing that I find sufficient is doing the stuff myself. That is also how I managed to get myself a job, being only 17. > Ah boy, this is a weird quirk of mine. Sometimes I will find a > group/community tied to a subject that moderately interests me, then > look in for a while. I eventually join the community and have a little > fun, but really realize that I'm kinda hypocritical in some way... or > eventually I realize I have nothing in common with the group and I've > simply been "studying" them all along. This KILLS me, especially with > something like this that would make such a large impact on my life. I > eventually feel left out and leave, depressed. Hmm, interesting! I have always been analizing people, but never expected a friendship from any of them at those times. Humans (I mean muggles), usualy flex their personalities completely when joining a community. I could never do that, because my instinct was in the way. > I tend to look at myself from the outside in, and how I look, act and > talk to other people. I examine every (imperfect)thing about me and my > environment. I am a neat freak when time liberates me to indulge, and > I listen to a lot of music, and thinking about each piece of it > inspres emotions in me. Music, eh? Ever tried tracking? () It's a nice way to compose music, even if you have as little of a musical talent as myself. > And GEEZ when I _do_ open up, I just blab and blab and... :) That's cool. You'll get to know many very usefull experiences if you allow me to try and comprehend your... er... "nonsense" humans would call it. This is because thinking of things on your own is so often missleading. Feel free to contact me. > > > Please reply! > > > > Absolutely... oh as long as you do too! I need that info! =P > > There it is. Thank you very much, CyberLegend. I'll kinda introduce > myself in another message later. > BTW Here's my MSN Profile: I'll have to check that later. > On AOL Instant Messenger I am CTPunkRockShow > On ICQ I am 154702690 Heh, thanx. You have all the contact info you ever wanted in my signature. The phone number, in case you'd ever want to use it, is of my personal phone, which nobody other than me will answer. -- I could run like the wind just to be with you. C'ya! -- Cellphone: 0038640809676 Don't feel bad about asking/telling me anything, I will always gladly reply. Digging for info? Try AI Meta Search: Http://WWW.AIMetaSearch.Com MesonAI -- If nobody else wants to do it, why shouldn't we?(TM) Http://WWW.MesonAI.Com