Roberto Blanco wrote:

> I'll be clear, you have asked a few things which have to be answered.

> Here are my answers. First of all, as long as it affects me of course I

> feel I have the right to know what your 'plans' for me actually are.

> Your defense evidences that you did have one purpose in mind and you did

> intend me to get to behave in a certain way. Mistake number one, that I

> call manipulation, speculation maybe, and I'm not at all fond of it.



Your arrogance is unbelivable.



"Don't belive what you hear,

don't belive what you see.

If you just close your eyes,

you can Feel the enemy."



It isn't what you know as manipulation it's what you should know as

Devotion. Allas your ears are obviously deaf to mine.



> Why do I have to behave this or that way for you to be content about me?



"When I first let you go,

you had Fire in your soul.

What happened to your face of melting snow?"



"...Can't let you go,

and I must be,

an Acrobat,

to talk like this,

and act like that..."



It's easy for you now that I love you, I won't let you go and I won't

let you hurt yourself, but you are free to do whatever you want for you

will never feel the consequences. And I am left with nothing but to

adapt to you for leaving you would mean my psychological sueccide. I do

not understand, why are you changing, who are you running away from? Me?

I am not content about your changes, simply because they are placing

your farther and farther away from me and I can't keep up!



> Another point. You mention the fact that, long-term, you love me. But

> what about short and middle-term? Is there any contradiction held in

> said affirmation?



On the long term I stay attached to you, on the short term, I will be

hurt if you hurt me.



> I obviously have to know what's going on around me, since I am

> concerned, I feel this is my right and I'm willing to enforce it

> whenever required. I have my life, my gift, and obviously its control.

> This is the fundamental right, nobody can deny this. I am in control of

> my life and decide who can get in and who can't, and how deep. I think

> everyone makes use of this rule, or at least should.

> 

> Time for a set of gaps, and on to what seems to be the problem. If you

> feel like I don't trust you so deeply the reason is ridiculously simple.

> Trust is based upon certain pedestals. One of these is acceptance. And

> yes, in case you are wondering I don't really feel accepted. I seem to

> scare you, bother you, and in general you seem not to like what I do the

> way I do. If you want me to behave this or that way, how can I feel

> confident to be myself?

> 

> Acceptance. That is one of the corner stones of a relation. Does it

> really make a difference if I would make love with another male, have

> dyed my hair blond, like piercings, enforce my own principles? Does it,

> to you?



"Now it looks like this:

Now you can swalow,

and you can spit,

or throw the love,

or choke on it.

And you can dream,

so dream aloud,

and you can find,

your own way out..."



I'm still the ol devoted lil wolf you met a long time ago on that

forsaken newsgroup. I cannot keep up with your changes and cannot accept

them because the wolf within says no. I feel if you would see the

importance of your wolf within you would see these things for yourself.



The current situation leaves me nothing with but a little sad and time

to get on with my life. With or without psychological survival.



-- 

I could run like the wind just to be with you.



			Observer aka DustWolf aka CyberLegend aka Jure Sah



C'ya!



--

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Don't feel bad about asking/telling me anything, I will always gladly

reply.



"Keeping an open mind is not about disregarding new definitions to

things."



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